I can't take a formal "break" while I'm working. You can't expect to set aside an arbitrary section of time to take for yourself when the flow of "customers", (read: "obnoxious alcoholics") streams at such an unpredictable rhythm. A predetermined block of time to be out from behind the bar just isn't an option. What you can do is wait for a slight break in the action, run outside, grab a cigarette, and wait until the masses demand more Jager Bombs, thus forcing you to run back inside on less than a moments notice. It's really not that bad when that happens, after all, the busier we are inside, the more money in tips I make, so I don't really mind it that much.
Here's what I do mind...
While standing outside, in those few peaceful moments I have to myself, there's inevitably some Asshole outside who wants to talk. Assholes like to ask questions like, "So how's your night going?", or "Having fun?", or worst of all "So, where are all the hot chicks at tonight?" There's nothing more annoying then trying to take a few peaceful moments to yourself and then feeling obligated to make mindless chit chat. Even worse is it's mindless chit chat that's technically off the clock.
Here's where the invention of the cell phone has been become my savior.
Grab your Iphone, stare at it, and pretend you're doing something important. It doesn't matter what it is. Look at your phone as if you're reading something more important the breakup of "Jon & Kate Plus 8", and people tend to leave you alone. If they see you become transfixed on the 3'5" screen your holding in front of you, they tend to leave you alone. Not for long, mind you, Assholes tend to have a very short grace period, but even if it's just a few peaceful beats, it makes all the difference. I've held the thing to my ear, had entirely fictional conversations, with completely fictional people, in order to preserve an all important moment of peace.
Steve Jobs, thanks for being my savior.
Now can you work on that fucking my phone thing?
